SHAANDAR A magnificent tale of boredom.

SHAANDAR (2015)

Imagine the movie QUEEN with tons of glitches and sloppy scenes and sadly pathetic direction and a non-charismatic story writing. That would be difficult in imagining stuffs like that with the title being QUEEN, now the same people who brought us QUEEN coalesce for SHAANDAR, and delivers all those un-imaginable stuffs with a magnificent set and locations. All that could possibly go wrong with this movie, went wrong. This movie created a big discrepancy considering a film like Queen.

Let me pithy you the story. On paper, Shaandaar is the story of two sisters. One is the adopted child, the pretty one who struggles to find acceptance and is an insomniac. The other is good at heart, tubby and being used by her mother and grandmother to secure a deal with a business partner because the Aroras are almost bankrupt, why do 2 bankrupts try to mingle ,leads to a big oblivion. The story looses its grip on direction and soon the survival hopes are relinquished in songs which fail to hold it either.

So, the screen opens up with the anime character of Pankaj Kapoor (Bipin) and baby Alia who is adopted by Bipin. No one having a clue about why has she been adopted by Bipin, welcomes  her to the family with a dreadful mother who squashes the doll bought by Alia by riding her electrically operated chair over it, if that expresses the intensity of the harshness, shouldn't you be swallowing a lump under your throat. The next character is her mother who is deary to her daughter and care-free towards Alia. Now Alia has this strange insomnia thing, and she keeps herself up by googling stuffs about insomnia. The only dream of Bipin is to find her a person who could put her to sleep. With this the characters turn into flesh, with Shahid kapoor riding a bike and lighting his cigar bumps into Bipin's car who is with his family heading to marry his daughter. Thus everyone are introduced there. From post this scene where the movie should have actually taken a leap from the unusual crap, instead it lands into more deeper crap and gives you crumbs to the absolute stupidity of the characters. The sinking story crams towards the interval and relays the story to the weaker 2nd half.

The weaker second half has odd timed songs as its biggest asset. And the mention able bikini scene of Alia Bhatt (absolutely why do boys have all the fun) and her end to insomnia is something so great that it weighs bigger than the wedding. The lurking scenes with loose editing and story loosens its ultimate grip when the scenes start to arise questions like Why did that happen? You see Alia bhatt served with panties in the breakfast, to which anybody including the director himself have no clue about. So such lame scenes deprive you from taking the movie any further.

The only positive part that really can't be considered in the favor of the movie is Dharma Productions set design and Karan Johar's cameo. If its KJO's production, then it has to be picturesque, and character who has a limp wrist (yes you guessed it right, a gay!!), so he does show up in the movie to bid a farewell to his magnificent set, in which what happened no one has single clue, but still it was named SHAANDAR.

Words of Wisdom: Even if you have watched the morning show which costs the least, you know it all went waste. NOT WORTHY AT ALL!! Watch the trailer and feel proud for you saved your bucks. In a nutshell ( -Queen x infinity non-sense) = SHAANDAR.


Rating: 2/10

Pyaar ka Punchnaama (PKP2): A cliched tale of misogyny.

This is the most common act that happens with every next sequel. The very thought that has been trailing, sequels are always a step behind than its prequel, is proven most audaciously in this episode. Let me decode the math of PKP2; +2 new male protagonists, - liquid, rest all lays the same. Now with this if you are drawing the negative conclusion, then I guess you are not wrong at all. Luv Ranjan has surely upgraded everything apart from the story. Apparently the stale story has been garnished with the shorts growing shorter and the jokes going more off #*%@#! (beep). The pretentious attitude always fails to charm the audience and we don’t understand why that has to be put in with such a major space.

The scale of the movie follows an exact sinusoidal graph; it peaks on both the poles and goes moderate. An engineer who gets a hefty package of 3L.P.(M) yes that is 3 lakhs per month has got all the time to shop and listen the countless bills spent and the episodes of how to save the money and also very strangely he is not annoyed by any official calls but only her girlfriend; a blatant case of misogyny pointed. But, when we are here to watch the movie that is a sequel to PKP, you can’t expect it to be so technically practical, because we all know we are here to understand the female chauvinism that drills down the alpha males and their sound life into their worst nightmares. Certainly the entertainment level stands true and is managed appallingly, but the fact still remains the same that, why the same again? Moreover it is not a sequel at all, it’s all new nonchalance with more bold scenes and same story. 

The movie turns the head down when the female protagonists start peaking down their level of maturity and starts to dominate the matured men, again pointing misogyny, and this time it is risen to an extreme level where you are welcomed to the world where best friends of your girlfriend are the best enemies of you, because, the best friend has the privilege to enjoy all those perks that you availed alongsidedly minus the ‘you have to take all my shit attitude’. As I said the story doesn’t peak but the dialogues are absolutely commendable, and very well delivered. The mentionable 15 minutes long dialogue, as said everything is upgraded, and it drops like a laughing bomb and amazingly everyone is reminded and connected to the epic PKP dialogue and we all burst out laughing. Reaching the climax, the 3 guys have had it all and ready to dump their bag full of rage and the victim of misogyny. One of the protagonists recites the poem of I LOVE YOU, and summarizes how cheap swag these words mean to him and plants a good bye kiss on her girlfriend. The gag just before interval is also a big lash on the annoying cigarette kills commercial ad that pops in every theatre hall and the climax scene of the movie also scores a good point where the alpha males finally get the answer to ‘True love’ and close their account by concluding that, to lead a happy life, its necessary to marry our hand (sarcasm) and love our mom.

Final say: Fun is absolutely filled in abundance, but nothing surprisingly new in PKP2. Certainly worth a fun watch.

My Rating: 6/10

THE WALK: INSANE VERTIGO

With the release of the 4 minutes long trailer, this movie had said it all about its what’s and who’s. Little left to be justified was the impeccable Walk and its story rammed with it. We’ve seen many biographical movies and all have been exhilarating, because, the example stands right before us live today, but fewer are those which have done something lunatic enough as that being their dream and have set successfully been landed behind the bars. One among such is Philippe Petit, who chose to tightrope walk between the twin towers. Had if this movie been a fiction art, trust me it would have nudged your brain every time when he pulls that insane stunt over the tightrope. Amazingly here you have to believe it, because this is a real performance. The 2 liner plot about this movie is, the former part of the film just introduces you to his dream, and the post part shows how he achieved it.

If you were to hear him saying all through the movie that how did it all start and with the tiniest detailing, surely your interest level would have soon met the ground, and that happens exactly in the first half. The extra detailed stuffs are showered and made you realize that it’s a real big shit he is talking about. Zemeckis has majorly focused on building the effect rather than being original, but the film in its post half soon lands in the final act. Trust me it surely is a real big shit, every single breath counts on that rope. The insane vertigo makes you feel sick, and the confidence on his face releases you off that tension. All this pulled out in 1974 on a construction of two 415 meter towers. It just amazes you with all respect and you have nothing more to say except a feeling of fulfillment.

In a biographical movie the best thing is, you need not like the protagonist or the female protagonist for their character played, it is their story that needs to be apprehended and respected. The important part is, the person embodying the legend should have leave an appealing effect, and Joseph Gordon Lewwit here leaves no stones un turned in putting that up to it. The very-high-wire sequence is genuinely gasp-inducing. See it in 3D on the largest screen available.

You might not fall off the rope, but you certainly will fall for Philippe.

My rating: 8/10